Tuesday, February 18, 2014

Roller Coaster

The past month has been an interesting roller coaster of physical and mental challenges.  Some were quite wee (Toby had his first haircut - but that will be another post entirely,) some were much larger and the physical had to do with some crushing fatigue.  I never set out to share my physical struggles on this blog and I still won't but my lack of updating is sometimes an indication of the old adage, "If you can't say anything nice don't say anything at all."

I'm still job hunting although losing my steam a bit . . . not one call back but I DID get one email rejection (woot.)  It is daunting.  Knowing that the biggest hurdle is the pay.  I have to get paid enough to put Toby in daycare and make it WORTH it.  There are so many jobs in this area I know I'll find something.  And I gave myself a mental deadline that is months away but still . . . I'm far too impatient for my own good.

I've fallen out of cooking as much and it is making me sad.  I love cooking and had fun with it but with the fatigue came the "easy" breakfast dinners and quick pasta meals that were mostly home made but still . . . sauce in a jar.  Oh, I "prepared" meals but there is nothing like making a meal from scratch. 

So, with my motivation waning, my confidence fizzling and my house a wreck I invested in . . .

*drum roll*

A Filofax.

Go on.  Google it.  It is an English thing.  Oh, it is JUST a planner.  But I've decided to make this wee planner my WORLD.  I've utterly failed to keep up with my life on my snazzy most awesome iPad mini.  So far I'm still working on it - but what I have accomplished is working out pretty darn well.  My biggest hurdle right now is economy of movement and use of time in my house.  I'm literally to the point where I want to time myself doing activities so that when I look at it later they don't feel so daunting.  "Want to sit on the couch Jen?  Why not take 8 minutes and sweep all the floors."  That type of thing.  My next step is to write messages to myself on Post -It notes and put them all over the house.

I will get out of this funk by sheer stubbornness - watch me!!  Rawr!

On a completely different note, the boys are awesome and trouble makes and Ethan ate all of my Valentine's chocolates for breakfast one morning and I love them so much I want to burst all the while hoping that Ethan stops eating that damned toothpaste and picking his nose . . .